argus hamilton daily column
Comedian and columnist Argus Hamilton's daily monologue of jokes on news events, politics, sports and celebrities. . The food went rancid Read more, The news according to Argus! Kim Jung Un was reported to be so angry, he stormed back to the palace, kicked his dog, and then ate it. Im an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist, Argus says. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. Patron-only posts and messages YOU MIGHT LIKE Going to The Store $5 / month Used cars Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur France - OOYYO Comedian Argus Hamilton - Jokes on the News, Daily The Centers for Disease Control reported a massive outbreak of bird flu in the United States has left 47 million chickens dead or dying, resulting in shortages. The World Health Organization reported 15 million new cases of COVID in the first week of the year when Omicron infections peaked. The Super Bowl is played today between the Philadelphia Eagles and Kansas City Chiefs at State Farm Stadium in Phoenix. Thank you for supporting Argus and his column! HOLLYWOOD--God bless America, and hows everybody?Tiger Woods is favored to win the Masters for the first time since his serial adultery blew up his marriage three years ago. Hollywood should stick to doing what it does best, cocaine and each other. Simone showed tremendous courage by stepping down from the very top because her mental state isn't quite right. Meet the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom. Argus Hamiltons daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Hamilton: Brady too old to be a quarterback, too young to be president, Hamilton: Egg shortage? AAE Named to Inc. Best Workplaces in 2022. Laugh Factory Laugh Factory Inc., or its affiliates. Argus Hamilton Column Updated: Apr 4, 2012, 8:55 AM Published: Apr 3, 2012, 8:56 AM HOLLYWOOD--God bless America, and how's everybody? But the successful stand-up comedian and newspaper columnist made a startling discovery about fun almost 30 years ago. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. Social media won't tolerate any observation unless it's serious. Yes, you can easily cancel or upgrade your pledge at any time. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations. Argus is regularly quoted by daily newspapers including The San Francisco Chronicle and the Los Angeles Times, by weekly business papers including the Orange County Business Journal, by Time magazine and by radio personalities including Paul Harvey.Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade.You can read Argus Hamiltons outrageously funny humor column on the Internet six days a week yes, six days a week (Unbelievable, says Yahoo.com). ExtremeInk.com - Information for Editors "What I would tell my fellow alcoholics and drug addicts is the biggest surprise I ever got is that recovery is more fun than partying. Qatar boasted there was no violence, no hooliganism, no alcohol-fueled rioting. Contact an All American Speakers Bureau booking agent for more information on Argus Hamilton speaking fees, availability, speech topics and cost to hire for your next live or virtual event. Elton John dared the Russian government to cancel his upcoming concert in Moscow Tuesday, saying he will speak Read more, Porn Hub, Obamacare and much more! Not just muppets Hamilton: ATM in the gym lobby is best machine to impress the women, Hamilton: Bud Light has always been trans its water that identifies as beer, Hamilton: I found nuclear launch codes in a fortune cookie, Hamilton: MSNBC crucifies Trump every morning, Fox raises him from the dead, Hamilton: The Founding Fathers would be on the FBI watch list today, Hamilton: Payoffs, hush money show Trump knows how to negotiate, Hamilton: Settling for Partly Cloudy Daniels, Hamilton: Alliance aligns with March Madness bracket picks, Hamilton: Not everybody can be Irish; somebody has to drive, Hamilton: Vodka mixes well with everything but decisions, Hamilton: Tax refund will pay for that dozen eggs, Hamilton: Money left in your bank account after taxes is an IRS red flag, Hamilton: Tinker Bell has new sister in latest movie, Hamilton: Life in prison is diminishing deterrent for the aging, Hamilton: This candidate gets you four presidents in one, Uncle Sams tall hat handy when its being passed around, Hamilton: Look how much I still owe to Ukraine, Hamilton: Prez shoots down balloon angioplasty idea out of habit. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. Democratic Congresswoman Rosa DeLauro called for gender equity in car safety testing Friday in House hearings. I hope Oscar night spotlights glamour and movie magic and not political issues. sustaining monthly donation. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. Hens are now identifying as roosters, Hamilton: Classified documents discovered at Mount Vernon, Hamilton: Our leaders taking their (classified) work home with them. Hamilton: In those Super Bowl ads, its about what sells beer. ArgusJokes.com - Blogger Read more, Miley Cyrus, George Clooney, Obamacare and much more Miley Cyrus and her boyfriend Liam Hemsworth reportedly broke up Monday due to her raunchy MTV Awards performance. They said it shows that in the past World Cups it was the gays who caused all the trouble. Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report By Argus Hamilton Published Dec. 21, 2022 Miss Manners notes the recent sharp decline in etiquette and social manners in public. Fox News cited an intelligence report Thursday saying UFO sightings have surged in the past two years in the U.S. CNN, NBC and ABC reported there were 400 sightings of UFOs in the U.S. last week. Lets face it. Argus Hamilton on the News: Elton John, Mayor Rob Ford, the NSA & more! [2] [3] [4] Hamilton began his stand-up comedy career at The Comedy Store. Fox News 92-year-old CEO Rupert Murdoch ordered Tucker Carlson fired, causing Fox stock to crash $980 million in value Monday, three days after he paid Dominion $787 million to settle a libel lawsuit. Keith Olbermann has been fired more times than a Civil War cannon.Wells Fargo opened a new banking firm Monday that serves people with fifty million dollars. There are Read more, In the news, General Petraeus agreed to face Congress to discuss the Benghazi attack and his sex scandal. Im starting to think Im responsible for this pandemic Buffalo warmed up Thursday ending the citys weeklong record blizzard home shutdown. Laugh Factory Inc., or its affiliates. Meet the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that.". 3 talking about this. Reaction was bad. The Los Angeles Times reports the second man to step foot on the moon, NASAs legendary Buzz Aldrin married a much younger woman on his 93rd birthday Saturday in a ceremony in Beverly Hills. Tom Brady was reported by Radar Online Tuesday to have decided to spend the next year before he becomes an NFL sportscaster performing stand-up comedy. The Walt Disney Company released the trailer for the upcoming action adventure Peter Pan and Wendy based on J.M. Argus Hamilton He had two mistresses fighting over him and a wife Read more. Presidents Day celebrates George Washington and Abraham Lincoln while Americans prepare to choose again between Donald Trump and Joe Biden. Argus Hamilton - Humor Times ArgusJokes.com: Argus Hamilton's column for 4-23-10 Read more, In the news, Bill Clinton hosts the annual Bob Hope Desert Classic in Palm Springs all week. See our Privacy Policy. That's not all. Get access to a fantastic community of comedy fans! More What We Offer Its a full-service bank. Copyright Notice: This website is protected by U.S. and International copyright laws. Editorials Letters Columns Rants & Raves. Help us keep the lights on with a small (or large!) Become a Humor Times patron via Patreon.com! "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that." China assured Taiwan they were just weather warships. Laugh Factory Inc., 8001 Sunset Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90046. Argus Hamilton is the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." sustaining monthly donation. The UN News reported Tuesday that plastic pollution in the world's oceans is expected to double by 2030. There are currently 157 luxury homes for sale in Cagnes-sur-Mer, Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur on JamesEdition. Tweet with a location. Oklahoma Speakers is a speakers bureau that specializes in helping meeting planners, corporations, and associations locate, select, and confirm the best speakers, entertainers and other talent for their events and meetings. Get ready for all of The Comedy Store tales! Bookmark the page and share it! Argus Hamilton on the News: Carnival Cruise No Carnival, Argus Hamilton on the News: Cyprus, Lohan and Much More, Fun With The News: Carnival Cruise Liner & More, Argus Has Fun With The News: Donald Trump & More, Fun With The News: Pot Legalization & More, Argus Has Fun with the News: Sex-Texting & More. When all the guys my age were back in high school, we fantasized about having sex with Raquel Welch. Modern Health advised Baby Boomers to take up vigorous exercise to maintain health and extend our lives. "I'm an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist," Argus says. The Canadian Snowbird Association reported that the state of Arizona gets a million Canadian visitors every year during the winter. Argus Hamilton on the News: Duck Dynasty & Much More! Find Property for sale in Cagnes-sur-Mer, Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur. All rights reserved. These cookies do not store any personal information. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. President Biden gleefully mocked Donald Trump Friday for issuing a limited set of trading cards as NFT for $99 on the crypto market. One boat capsized and steering mountings were knocked loose.Its times like this when Mitt Romneys yacht elevator in La Jolla suggests hed be a wise steward of the U.S. economy.Current TV fired Keith Olbermann as host of the cable networks evening news show Friday. The students dont mind.They think its worth it to work day and night for free because if they make it to the Final Four they get drafted by the NBA.The Mega Millions first prize was split by three ticketholders Saturday. Property for Sale in Cagnes-sur-Mer, Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur Political Column syndicated in 180 newspapers across the US daily Official Comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial Fee Range $7,500 - $10,000 Traveling From Oklahoma and California Meet Argus Hamilton, the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." 63,852 used cars for sale from Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur. However consider the argument for sloth. Luxury homes for sale in Cagnes-sur-Mer, Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur He'd just steal the show. Contents of this site are Copyright 2023 Prescott Newspapers, Inc. and Western News&Info, Inc. All rights reserved. In college I dedicated my life to causing as much trouble as he did. We'll never post to Facebook without your permission We will access Facebook to get and use your email address, NBC's broadcast of the Summer Olympics in Japan began to draw bigger TV ratings this week as the public became familiar with some of the athletes. The Silicon Valley Banks failure was blamed on the combination of higher interest rates and the banks woke business practices. [1] [6] Biography Be the first to receive new merch items! And it was shot down for good reason. Related Tags: Information on keynote speaking engagements, personal appearances, corporate entertainment and appearance fees for Argus Hamilton, an inspirational motivational speaker. Copyright 1979 - 2022. Argus Hamilton | Stories | The Daily Courier | Prescott, AZ I compare the voting rights bill to Jussie . Please Note: All American Speakers Bureau is a full-service talent booking agency providing information on booking Argus Hamilton for speaking engagements, personal appearances and corporate events. Argus Hamilton, Southern Man of Taste - Apple Podcasts Donald Trumps indictment was ripped by conservative legal experts Friday and glorified by pundits on the Left. Call us to speak with a booking agent to discuss your event or specific speaker request. Watch Review and Buy used cars online at OOYYO. Argus Hamilton | creating comedy column and videos | Patreon Help us keep the lights on with a small (or large!) Oklahoma Hypnotist, Ventriloquist, Announcer & "Voice of OETA" Featured on "Good Morning America" and in TIME magazine Known as Darci Farmer's Long Time Coach (the Hit Sensation Seen on America's Got Talent), Former ABC War Correspondent; CNN's Former Chief Terrorism Correspondent Recently Embedded in Iraq & Afghanistan with ABC Subject of the ABC documentary film "The Hornet's Nest" (released 2014), Motivational Speaker and Author Customer Experience Expert Customer Service Speaker and Author. Shes going by the book. Thomas Sowell Column on Twitter: "Argus Hamilton - Argus Hamilton's During the shutdown, the cable news showed a Buffalo man trudging his way through six feet of snow and clearing a path barehanded. One thing Read more, Rodeo clowns and sensitivity training: Talk about your joke setups! Its nearly impossible for his friends to get him the right birthday gift. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Rodeo Clowns & Much More! Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Twinkies, Royal Babies & More, Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Paula Deen & Much More. This Christmas, Kanye West will be going from house to house to make your drunk uncle seem OK. As we share our homes with relatives and loved ones, we are reminded of that first Christmas scene. By allowing ads to appear on this site, you support the local businesses who, in turn, support great journalism. Oklahoma humorist Argus Hamilton and others will appear at the OKC Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. Argus performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. However the bar is set pretty high for Brady. But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience. St. Patricks Day Parades are held today, a precious day for Irish Catholic Americans. Argus Hamilton on the News: Toronto Mayor, Obamacare & More! "I'm an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist," Argus says. The court ruled that its discriminatory to make only the white and Asian high school students do their homework.Apple was reported Monday to be using college interns who work for free in Apples Chinese assembly factories. Barries classic 1904 English stage hit. The cop asked me why I ran through a red light and I told him its 2023, I dont see color. Argus Hamilton - Humor Times If he falls down the steps everyone will know hes running for president. I remember a bartender shouted out, asking does anyone knows CPR so I yelled, I know ALL the letters of the alphabet! Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Oklahoma Speakers 2023. Governor Cuomo was questioned for hours over sex harassment charges. Each month, get a new mug, shirt, sticker, etc. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. All rights reserved. Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade. Argus is regularly quoted by daily newspapers including The San Francisco Chronicle and the Los Angeles Times, by weekly business papers including the Orange County Business Journal, by Time magazine and by radio personalities including Paul Harvey. Biden will open by declaring the State of the Union is strong, and theres evidence Joe is right. [6] Robin Williams called him "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom". Meet the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Argus Hamilton, Southern Man of Taste The Comedy Store Podcast Stand-Up Argus has seen it all and today he shares a couple of stories in which the felonies that were committed have passed the statute of limitations for prosecution in the great state of California. GALLERIES. Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts stepped in Monday and gave Title 42 a chance to stop the invasion of illegal immigrants and deadly drugs pouring across the border. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report - Argus Hamilton - Jewish World Review Comedian Argus Hamilton Senior Living reports retirement communities in Palm Springs now offer Baby Boomers enclosed gated neighborhoods with golf courses, pools, tennis courts, clubhouses with billiard rooms, gyms and card rooms. The next day he got a nice card from Nancy Pelosi urging him to stay positive. Hes also gotten the boot from MSNBC, KCBS, Fox Sports, NBC Football Night in America and ESPN. Right Opinion: About Argus Hamilton | The Patriot Post Across the Street Courier Cooks Neighbors Puzzles Real Estate Top Jobs. Let's see what our Doctors of the Soul have to say. Well, I don't know about Laurel, she looks more like Hardy to me. They say that life imitates art but more often it imitates Gilligan's Island. Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade. Who is Argus Hamilton, and why is everybody quoting him? By Argus Hamilton. So far Read more, Apple introduces the new iPad Air, demonstrates it on the ObamaCare website Apple introduced a new iPad and called it the iPad Air Tuesday. This year Bill Murray was in Florida telling cameras here we are at Tom Bradys retirement again. Hamilton-Just two more payments and those dozen eggs are all mine, Hamilton: Cant find financing for an egg salad sandwich, Hamilton: UFOs dropped off classified docs in a Delaware garage, Hamilton- All China needs is the Colonels secret recipe. 69 and Robin Drive takes Diamond Valley residents by surprise, Need2Know: Bed Bath and Beyond announces beginning of closure process; Outdoor retailer REI Co-op to open Prescott store this fall; C&C Cyclery offers products and services to mountain bikers, Contents of this site are Copyright 2023 Prescott Newspapers, Inc. and Western News&Info, Inc. All rights reserved. Bookmark the page and share it! Who is Argus Hamilton, and why is everybody quoting him? Hamilton: Two old guys in the theater balcony? By Argus Hamilton, January 18, 2014 A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. Hamilton: Did Madonna get stung by a bee? Argus Hamilton admits he's not the type of guy to do something that's no fun. Do the Bidens ever take one day off? However last week in L.A., I. He said Italians are emotional people who like to express themselves physically. See if they are performing this week at Laugh Factory! Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are as essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Hamilton: What happened to presidential quality control? You may have a drinking problem if you drink stuff that not only hits the spot, but also removes it. Things even out. Electing a guy with Donald Trump's personality as the president is like marrying a nymphomaniac. Contact Argus@ArgusHamilton.com for more information. "I'm an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist," Argus says. Be the first on your block to get the new Humor Times t-shirt!! People magazine just named her least Likely Ever to Become President. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Miley Cyrus and Much More! Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. Please join them, and help support independent media! It costs $6 million for a 30-second commercial. FEATURES. Now Biden wants to issue his own trading card, but he's terrified they'll put his career stats on the back of the card. When he's in Los Angeles, he can be seen working out the latest material nightly at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. They handle millions of web visitors at a time. In their new ad campaign, Carnival promises to treat you like Read more, In the news, Cyprus agreed to seize ten percent of the money in high-level Cyprus bank accounts to avoid bankruptcy. The Treasury Department released Congressional Budget Office statistics revealing that federal revenue this year will top $4 trillion dollars, mostly from income taxes and payroll taxes. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. You can enjoy Argus' nationally syndicated column five days a week, Tuesday through Friday and Sunday, 52 weeks a year. Forbes magazine published an article called Ten Reasons to Drink During the Holidays, citing the sociable nature of office parties and family reunions. friend list, interests, likes and public profile, which includes your name, profile picture, user ID, age range, gender, networks, Scientists say its far from over and prepare for new variants. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Argus Hamilton performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. And to cap it off, Ruperts much-younger fiance just called off the marriage. Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report - Argus Hamilton Les municipalits ont tenu profiter d'un moment de rpit dans la crise sanitaire pour clbrer la fte Nationale. Hamilton: Do you know all the letters of the alphabet? Les festivits du 14 juillet sont toutes maintenues sur la Cte d'Azur. All American Speakers Bureau is a full-service talent booking agency providing information on booking Argus Hamilton for speaking engagements, personal appearances and corporate events. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Umbrella-gate & More! The same day, Chinas navy sent three warships into Taiwanese territorial waters. She actually demanded that half of the crash dummies used be female crash dummies. JamesEdition can help you find the home that match all the preferences for your dream home. Santa Claus has a new helper this year. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade. They want Florida, New Jersey and California to tear down all the Trump statues on his golf courses. It was a challenge for the legendary golfer. Argus Hamilton is the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. The St. Louis Post Dispatch said Anheuser-Busch executives met with beer distributors to assure them all marketing from now on will be vetted from the top. language, country and your other public info. The Comedy Store is sending me down to San Diego on New Years Eve to perform at the Comedy Store La Jolla on its 45th anniversary. Argus Hamilton performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. Comedian and columnist Argus Hamilton's daily monologue of jokes on news events, politics, sports and celebrities. Lets see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that.. You just select one of the six lines on the table. Theyre getting clobbered at the All You Can Eat Buffets. Hamilton is well known among newspaper readers for his daily syndicated column, now carried in more than 100 newspapers, in which he pokes fun at news and newsmakers. Smaller Twinkies seen as un-American Hostess Twinkies returned Tuesday but the new Twinkies weigh less and have less calories than old Twinkies. The difference is President Biden twice last week indicated that he is planning to announce that hes running for re-election for president soon. Check out our current wonderful Sustaining Supporters here! A taxing Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day. If you dont think that painkillers make you goofy and funny, how do you explain Jerry Lewiss career?President Obamas campaign ads linked Mitt Romney to Big Oil on Monday after the president attacked oil profits.
